A recovering addict has their negative demons to go through, and the last thing that they need is someone saying the wrong thing to them that can offset another set of emotions for them. Anybody who takes that first step on going to rehab or therapy is already aware of their situation, and your job is to simply be there for support when they need it.
“You have no ambition.”
Saying something like this is not only disrespectful, but it also shows you as someone who isn’t as respecting. Maybe they have ambition and maybe they don’t. Maybe they do but their ambition and their big dreams cause anxiety and that is what has caused their addiction. It’s vital never to assume anyone’s goals in life-based no whether they are sober or not.
“I’ve gone through so much worse. So you need to get it together.”
Whether you have gone through something similar or not, you need to know that everybody has their own struggles. You did not go through the same exact thing as your loved one is going through their own demons. Sometimes, saying something along these lines can be inspirational, but avoid it at all costs because it can be misinterpreted in the wrong way.
“I drink and use drugs too. Why can’t you hold it together like me?”
Again, you are a different person. You have your own thought processes and ways of being. Just because you don’t fall prey to consistent addiction with drug and alcohol use does not mean others can do the same.
“You’re the only one I know who is dealing with this.”
The truth is that the person who is getting help is the only honest person in your life who is trying.to change. Many current addicts are people whom you never would expect. Don’t say this phrase at all because you could be totally wrong.
“You’re never going to change.”
You need to switch this phrase with anything else that positively reaffirms their improvement. Positive reinforcement is going to make all the difference for them. Pushing them downwards is going to negatively decrease their confidence with the change that they are already trying to do.
“You’re so selfish for doing drugs.”
Saying this is so disrespectful. Most people who are addicts need serious help, and they can’t just will away an addiction or a condition that has reprogrammed their brain chemistry. With the added emotional trauma underneath the surface, saying things like these can be even more detrimental to how they view themselves.
“You’re doing this all wrong. Recovery is supposed to be done this way.”
The last thing you need to avoid saying is something that would make them feel bad for already trying to go to rehab. If they are trying to improve and they have rehab throughout the week, you need to be supportive and be there for them. No need to make them feel bad that they aren’t doing it the way you expect them to.
If you have someone in your life who is currently getting help for their addiction abuse, your job is to be there for the 100 percent. Do not be the person who reinforces the negative thoughts that they already put on themselves. Just a few wrong choices of words can send them in a downward spiral.
The phrases above are definitely a few to avoid at all costs. Anything you may say that is along the lines of the phrases above must also be avoided. There are plenty of ways to ignite the joy and motivation in them without bringing them down. Be supportive. Be loving. Share some encouragement. Be wise with what you say, and you will surely be the light they need.
